Everybody Dies

Patient: "I was in a car accident last month."
House: "I won a swimming trophy in high school. Your turn."

Adams: "You took a new case?"

Park: "You ran tests yourself?"

House: "I saw the chance to help someone in need and I instinctively . . . oh no, wait, that was someone else's instincts."

Foreman: "You're asking me to perjure myself."
House: "It's a tiny white lie. No offense. Especially since from what I hear nothing black is tiny. Except your penis, I guess."

Amber: "Stop being an idiot."
House: "Can I have Kutner back please?"
Amber: "How much pathetic wallowing do I have to sit through?"
House: "How are things in hell? Is the humidity the big issue?"

"You should have gotten suspicious when his visiting cousin signed in as Mr. Tar H. Horse."

Foreman: "You set me up."
House: "Not really. You were going to basically perjure yourself so that I could delay jail time. Doesn't it make more sense to actually perjure yourself so that I can actually avoid jail time?"

"Every patient I've had, 70 years from now they'll all be as dead as Wilson. Everybody dies. It's meaningless."

House: "So that's the great wisdom you're imparting? That I'll always be alone?"

Wilson: "There's only one person you can count on."
House: "I thought there were two."

"Is this hell? An eternity of people trying to convince me to live?"

Cameron: "You're afraid of this decision, and you're trying to argue until fate takes it out of your hands. You're taking the cowardly way out. And worse: you're too cowardly to even admit you're taking the cowardly way out."
House: "You're right. But I can change."

"I'm dead, Wilson. How do you wanna spend the next five months?"

"Cancer is boring."