Raising Hope

MON 8/7c MAY 27

Raising Hope

My Family is Crazy

Everyone has a little crazy in their family.
Share a quick and funny story from your
childhood (or parenthood) that makes
you wonder just how you all survived.

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Crazy Stories:

Neighbors

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My family is very redneck and I mean my first driving lesson was on a 4X4 course. So one summer, the field at my house was filled with junk cars and my dad decided he was going to be a monster truck driver and drive over the cars.... It was quite entertaining and we got in trouble by the neighbors. Now he's living his dream as an actual monster truck driver.

Hazard

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When I was six months old, my parents split up. When I was little, I would go to my dad's apartment every few weeks with my big brother. Once, when we were 4 and 6, my dad was supposed to be watching us. My mom called at about 12. She said to give him the phone. I said he's asleep. She asked how long he'd been asleep. 1-1/2 days. Crazier: he slept for another 1/2 a day!

Relatives

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When I started school, I was so proud of the fact I knew my ABCs and 123s. I was taught them by my dad while hanging out at the neighborhood bar every night. You see, back then you would choose a letter and a number to hear the song you wanted on the juke box.

Relatives

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A few years ago on Christmas day, all of the family headed to my Grandma's house -- or least that's what I thought. Actually, all the adults went shopping but there was only generic clothing left. Let's just say that nobody was very happy that year.

Lucky to be Alive

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My family was in a cooking section at a store. They had these little knives with loops to hold them. I was five at the time. I was swinging it around and cut my thumb. My Mom asked for a Band-Aid because I was bleeding but the manager would not give us one. My Mom took me into the bathroom and used some paper towels. Then we left the store. The end.

Real Dumb

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My great-grandpa divorced a woman and married her daughter and they had my grandpa and his brothers. My grandpa's brother married my grandma's sister and his other brother married my grandma's cousin. My cousin got one of my friends pregnant, and then my other cousin got that same friend's sister pregnant. Every generation, our family gets a little more messed up.

Lucky to be Alive

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At mom's birthday at Olive Garden, my dad told our table about my mom's home surgery. She had a skin tag (white mole) that was bugging her, so she gave herself a local anesthetic (for an animal) and my dad sterilized his pocket knife and cut off. My sister then stitched her up with needle and thread. My uncle then said to me, "I see why you moved out..."

Relatives

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One morning, while getting ready for school, I was unable to find my shoes. I searched everywhere. I asked my brother & sister if they saw my shoes. Neither one had. I asked my mom and she said the last time she wore them she put them away. Finally, after searching I happen to spot them behind the couch (out of the corner of my eye I saw my mom smile). Call me neat freak.

Real Dumb

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A frequently-told dinner table story: One day, my sister saw my niece sitting in the corner. When she went to her, my sister noticed bug legs (a FL palmetto bug) on her lips. She asked the doctor if it would harm her to eat the bugs and he said as long as they were not dead (they could have been poisoned) it was okay. She was actually eating live cockroaches. Gross!

Real Dumb

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When we visited my grandma's house, we would play practical jokes on her. She would make her bed and we would unmake it. She would leave her purse in one spot and we would move it. She finally figured things out after a while. At first, she thought she was losing it!

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