Raising Hope

MON 8/7c MAY 27

Raising Hope

My Family is Crazy

Everyone has a little crazy in their family.
Share a quick and funny story from your
childhood (or parenthood) that makes
you wonder just how you all survived.

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Crazy Stories:

Relatives

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One Christmas, my kid sister fell into a duck pond. As she flailed and wailed, stuck like a turtle on its back, I ran inside to get help. My mother wouldn't let me speak until the adults finished their conversation. Always the obedient child, I waited ... then, big inhale,"SIS FELL IN THE POND!" I never saw adults move so fast, lips so blue, or my Dad so mad at my Mom.

Sufferin’ Siblings

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My Grandma used to pack my brother and me into a tiny car, crank the heater up extra high, refuse to crack a window, chain smoke a pack of cig's and proceed to drive us to any store a minumum of 25 miles away from the closest store to buy mushrooms that were on sale for three cents cheaper than the store next door. One can only hold their breath for so long. HORRIBLE!

Sufferin’ Siblings

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When I was about 7 or so, my school went on a field trip. My sister got really mad at me and cut my hair. Then I cut hers back. Then a few other people joined in and the teachers spent ages yelling at us. When I came home my mother was really mad. I ended up having to get 8 inches of my hair cut off!

Emergency Room

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I walked in on my parents "in bed" when I was 17. I closed my eyes and started running away. I then hit the banister super hard and flew over. I landed on my back. My parents called 911. I had to explain my story repeatedly to all the nurses and doctors because they thought it was hilarious. Worst night of my life.

Hazard

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At 16 me and two of my best friends were bored in the winter and we came up with a great way to go sledding. We got a sheet, tied a knot in the end of it slammed that in the trunk and held on to the other end for dear life going about 30 mph behind a car on a saucer sled on country roads. There were about 40 ways we could have died that day, but I still think it was fun!

Lucky to be Alive

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My sister and I would slide down the carpeted stairs on our sleeping bags. The sleeping bags were slick so we'd go down really fast. Our stairs turned and had a landing, so we would slam into the wall. One day, my sister convinced me to go down headfirst inside my sleeping bag and she'd push me. I said okay. We didn't break anything so our parents didn't mind.

Real Dumb

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When I was 7, my dad and I walked through the woods after an evening in the deer stand. He scared me by telling me that he had heard something nearby and convinced me to get up REAL close behind him. When I got close, he broke wind in my face. At 7, I was head-level with his rear end.

Relatives

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Back in the '60s, my dad would bring home blobs of mercury from work for us kids to play with. We'd dump it out of the container and move it around with our bare fingers on the kitchen table; however, he would yell at my mom for using hair spray because the chemicals were bad for the air.

Relatives

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My dad was always big on horror films. When I was 7 we watched The Exorcist. I went to bed and it began to shake! I ran to my mom and she told me to knock it off and go to sleep. I got back in the bed and it started jumping up, causing me to go in the air. I went sobbing to my mom, which is when she asked where my dad was. He came out from under my bed, laughing.

Real Dumb

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My wife and I gave a long list of rules to the kids about our brand new hot tub. One afternoon we came home to find our kids and their friends doing cannonballs into the hot tub from the roof of our house. Our oldest was 7 and was surprised at how upset we were and with complete sincerity pointed out that it wasn't on the list of rules.

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