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Everyone has a little crazy in their family.
Share a quick and funny story from your
childhood (or parenthood) that makes
you wonder just how you all survived.
Read other crazy family experiences and vote on your favorites below.
Submit Another StoryRelated
On a school ski trip, I decided to go snowboarding. I stunk. Strangely, I passed it then we had to go down the hill. I tried, but I fell and could not get up. I accidentally knocked down the instructor's board. The guy started to yell at me then ran down hill. When he came back up he yelled again and told me the board had hit a little girl.
When we were kids, we moved around a lot. One night after a recent move, my brother got up to pee. He walked across the hall into the linen closet and let loose (he thought it was the bathroom). The next morning, we smelled urine and opened the closet door to see that not only had he peed in there but he hadn't even aimed! There were wet spots from ceiling to carpet!
My dad's family is flipping bananas. One year, I got a dead rat for Christmas as a "joke." We had to start a No Dead Crap rule for gift giving. An aunt taped her dog's ear with duct tape instead of taking him to the vet after he ripped it. She also has old garage doors around her above ground pool for a privacy fence. The city fined her for all the crap in her yard.
I learned early on not to piss off Auntie. She thought her husband was having an affair and she actually nailed his workbooks to the floor and super glued his ***** to his leg (while he was sleeping). He stayed married to her for another couple of years. He probably wanted to leave quietly!
Every year my father puts on a fireworks show for the family. One time, we were all watching the show when suddenly there was a huge exlosion. Turns out my uncle put the firework in upsidown, so it exploded into the ground. He couldn't hear for a week.
My dad is DUMB. If it wasn't so fun watching him screw up, it would be sad. We had a door that was sticking on the TOP. He removed it and shaved off an inch from the BOTTOM, He hung it back up, it still stuck so he took it down, shaved more off and so on. The door STILL sticks. Now when our cat wants to come in from outside, he puts his whole head under the door and meows!
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One afternoon at work, my dad was shredding papers. As he leaned over the shredder to grab a sheet, the tie he was wearing happened to dangle close enough to activate the shredder's motion sensors. All of a sudden his tie began to shred, choking him! At the last minute, my dad was able to cut off his tie. For the rest of the day, he had a nubby tie.
My dad's clothes weren't done drying yet, so Einstein put his still damp underwear in the microwave, set it on high, and then walked away. Within seconds, the kitchen filled with acrid black smoke. He boiled a can of beans in a pot of water without opening it because he didn't want to do dishes. It exploded all over. Oh, did I mention that he is a FIREFIGHTER?
When I was 4, my two sisters and I each had a Barbie. One sister was mad at the other, so she convinced me to throw her Barbie away. She told me I could take it out of the garbage later, so I did it. The garbage got taken out, however. Since I was the one who threw the Barbie away, I had to give mine to my sister. I didn't have another Barbie until I was 7!
I have 5 siblings. We are all home-schooled. We get pretty bored sometimes. My mother gets this stuff called kepher that's like buttermilk but it ferments and molds. It's kinda creepy. It's like health junk that my mom makes us have. Anyway, one time we got bored and dumped a few tablespoons of baking powder into it......it exploded when my mom opened it...
of Raising Hope
