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Everyone has a little crazy in their family.
Share a quick and funny story from your
childhood (or parenthood) that makes
you wonder just how you all survived.
Read other crazy family experiences and vote on your favorites below.
Submit Another StoryWhen we were kids, we moved around a lot. One night after a recent move, my brother got up to pee. He walked across the hall into the linen closet and let loose (he thought it was the bathroom). The next morning, we smelled urine and opened the closet door to see that not only had he peed in there but he hadn't even aimed! There were wet spots from ceiling to carpet!
My dad's family is flipping bananas. One year, I got a dead rat for Christmas as a "joke." We had to start a No Dead Crap rule for gift giving. An aunt taped her dog's ear with duct tape instead of taking him to the vet after he ripped it. She also has old garage doors around her above ground pool for a privacy fence. The city fined her for all the crap in her yard.
I learned early on not to piss off Auntie. She thought her husband was having an affair and she actually nailed his workbooks to the floor and super glued his ***** to his leg (while he was sleeping). He stayed married to her for another couple of years. He probably wanted to leave quietly!
Every year my father puts on a fireworks show for the family. One time, we were all watching the show when suddenly there was a huge exlosion. Turns out my uncle put the firework in upsidown, so it exploded into the ground. He couldn't hear for a week.
Related
One afternoon at work, my dad was shredding papers. As he leaned over the shredder to grab a sheet, the tie he was wearing happened to dangle close enough to activate the shredder's motion sensors. All of a sudden his tie began to shred, choking him! At the last minute, my dad was able to cut off his tie. For the rest of the day, he had a nubby tie.
When I was 4, my two sisters and I each had a Barbie. One sister was mad at the other, so she convinced me to throw her Barbie away. She told me I could take it out of the garbage later, so I did it. The garbage got taken out, however. Since I was the one who threw the Barbie away, I had to give mine to my sister. I didn't have another Barbie until I was 7!
I have 5 siblings. We are all home-schooled. We get pretty bored sometimes. My mother gets this stuff called kepher that's like buttermilk but it ferments and molds. It's kinda creepy. It's like health junk that my mom makes us have. Anyway, one time we got bored and dumped a few tablespoons of baking powder into it......it exploded when my mom opened it...
One day, my family was sitting at the dinner table and arguing when suddenly my father picked up his steak knife and tossed it behind him. The knife flew through the kitchen and over the sink into the wall! The knife was stuck in the wall, perfectly thrown without looking. "Do it again, Dad!" my sister and I laughed. He just looked at us and smirked devilishly. He won.
On my first morning driving to school, I stopped my Yugo at a stop sign and it stalled. After several attempts to start it, I put the car in neutral and rolled it off the road. While waiting outside for my dad to pick me up, my car started rolling. I hopped into the car just in time to roll into a deep ditch...and my bus happened to drive by at that moment. Mortification!
My dad, a man with a quirky approach to life, found a wasp's nest on the lawn. His solution was not for the fainthearted. He stuck a tube into the ground and poured petrol down the tube. He then threw a lit match at the petrol-sodden grass, the location of said nest, and ran. His surprise at the ensuing explosion was nothing compared to my mum's.
of Raising Hope
