Raising Hope

MON 8/7c MAY 27

Raising Hope

My Family is Crazy

Everyone has a little crazy in their family.
Share a quick and funny story from your
childhood (or parenthood) that makes
you wonder just how you all survived.

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Your experiences

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Crazy Stories:

Real Dumb

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On a road trip with my uncle and my newly-divorced mom, my uncle thought passing gas was funny so he did it A LOT. It was awful so I complained loudly. Fart, complain, fart, complain, fart, complain. Finally my mom had enough and pulled onto the shoulder of the busy freeway, made us get out, and she drove away. She drove quite a while before coming back to get us.

Neighbors

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My daughter had an imaginary friend named Cindy who often visited our house to play dolls or eat lunch. One day my four-year-old told the sitter she was going next door to Cindy's house and left. I returned a few hours later and she was nowhere to be found. The neighborhood went on full alert, including the police, who found her at a park two miles away!

Relatives

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My cousin got a raisin stuck up his nose at a family get-together. Those things absorb water and triple in size when they're in the nostril. It was like childbirth watching it emerge. After some Lamaze breathing and a lot of coaching, it finally made its way back down the nasal canal. We christened it Ray.

Relatives

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My two older sisters decided they wanted to play cowboys and cows. As the youngest and smallest, I was the cow. They wrestled me down and then my older sister proceeded to the fire place and withdrew the fire poker. I struggled to get away when I saw the red hot poker coming at me. Thank goodness our mother walked in and saved me! To this day, I have no tattoos.

Relatives

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At 2 years old, I was returned to my parents' doorstep by our trash collector and, luckily, friend of my father's. I had managed to wander 2-1/2 miles away from home (losing my diaper along the way), ending up at the intersection of Lakeline Blvd. and HWY 183. I am lucky to be alive and I believe my parents have since recovered from this experience.

Relatives

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My dad worked for a furniture company. When I was 5, there was a customer who wouldn't pay and came to our house in a rage. My sisters and I were terrified. Dad slipped out the back, army crawled around the side of the house, sneaked up on the guy, slugged him, threw him back in his car, and pushed the car out of the driveway. Nobody threatened Dad's little girls!

Scarred For Life

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On Thursday, my older sister had to drive me to choir rehearsal. When we went into the garage, we found that the only car to drive was the stick shift. After that ride, I was happy to be alive. Every 5 feet, the car would shake! Never again will I get in that car with her as the driver!

Real Dumb

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My Grandma used to pack my brother and me into a tiny car, crank the heater up extra high, refuse to crack a window, chain smoke a pack of cig's and proceed to drive us to any store a minumum of 25 miles away from the closest store to buy mushrooms that were on sale for three cents cheaper than the store next door. One can only hold their breath for so long. HORRIBLE!

Lucky to be Alive

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I walked in on my parents "in bed" when I was 17. I closed my eyes and started running away. I then hit the banister super hard and flew over. I landed on my back. My parents called 911. I had to explain my story repeatedly to all the nurses and doctors because they thought it was hilarious. Worst night of my life.

Friends

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At 16 me and two of my best friends were bored in the winter and we came up with a great way to go sledding. We got a sheet, tied a knot in the end of it slammed that in the trunk and held on to the other end for dear life going about 30 mph behind a car on a saucer sled on country roads. There were about 40 ways we could have died that day, but I still think it was fun!

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