Everyone has a little crazy in their family.
Share a quick and funny story from your
childhood (or parenthood) that makes
you wonder just how you all survived.
Read other crazy family experiences and vote on your favorites below.Submit Another Story
One 4th of July, my family and friends were enjoying a fine time with beer, booze, & homemade explosives. We were rudely interrupted by a lunatic neighbor screaming about how we were going to blow up his house. He screamed on and on about how it was illegal. My dad's crazy friend ran out with an decommissioned WW2 grenade and screamed, "Is THIS illegal?" The neighbor fled.
I live in a 60-year-old manufactured smoke-detectorless, fire hazard, clutterbomb mess of a house with my parents, sister, and our own private zoo. I thought it would be a good idea to get fire protection (in the form of Jiffy POP). It was a good idea because my sister fell asleep while cooking something on the stove and the kitchen caught fire. POP POP extinguisher!
Once, I heard a crackling noise coming from the hall. My dog was eating a plastic bag! He was fine, but the next day he had to go to the bathroom and my mom had to stand there to make sure he didn't run off. She saw something shiny coming out of him. It was a needle that he ate! We took him to the vet, who said he was fine. Lucky!
I once hid in the hallway bathroom, lights off, wearing a scream costume to scare my aunt as she walked down the hallway to her room. Unfortunately, my grandpa had decided to make a bathroom trip. With his pants around his ankles, he jumped from side to side and screamed a few profanities as I confessed that it was me. He had just had a heart attack 2 weeks before.
When I was six months old, my parents split up. When I was little, I would go to my dad's apartment every few weeks with my big brother. Once, when we were 4 and 6, my dad was supposed to be watching us. My mom called at about 12. She said to give him the phone. I said he's asleep. She asked how long he'd been asleep. 1-1/2 days. Crazier: he slept for another 1/2 a day!
My family was in a cooking section at a store. They had these little knives with loops to hold them. I was five at the time. I was swinging it around and cut my thumb. My Mom asked for a Band-Aid because I was bleeding but the manager would not give us one. My Mom took me into the bathroom and used some paper towels. Then we left the store. The end.
At mom's birthday at Olive Garden, my dad told our table about my mom's home surgery. She had a skin tag (white mole) that was bugging her, so she gave herself a local anesthetic (for an animal) and my dad sterilized his pocket knife and cut off. My sister then stitched her up with needle and thread. My uncle then said to me, "I see why you moved out..."
On one of my dad's fishing trips, the weather turned bad so he left his fish on the stringer to return to them the next day. The next day, my dad decided to take us kids with him to retrieve his fish. We were so excited to go. Little did we know that we would travel through the woods, scale a cliff with the Kern River at our feet and returned soaked from the rain storm.
of Raising Hope