Raising Hope

MON 8/7c MAY 27

Raising Hope

My Family is Crazy

Everyone has a little crazy in their family.
Share a quick and funny story from your
childhood (or parenthood) that makes
you wonder just how you all survived.

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Crazy Stories:

Vacation

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My grandmother truly believed my mother was born in a spaceship. My brother and I used to visit when we were children and we wouldn't know where she was at different points during our stay. She would be out in the corn field because they had landed or she would be on the deck with her flashlight communicating with them. I have lots of CRAZY stories. I could go on and on.

Family Outing

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As part of a fun day, we would take our 2 children (then 2 and 4) to the mall. We walked into a store and when we walked out, our 2 year old was eating a cookie. I grabbed it from him and asked who had given him a cookie. His 4 year old brother said, "I did." I asked from where. He pointed to the store. It wasn't a cookie. It was a dog biscuit.

Family Outing

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Once, my family (plus a bunch of relatives) went on vacation to a ski lodge in the Poconos. I think the only thing that we actually enjoyed about the ski lodge was the arcade. There was a Dance Dance Revolution Supernova machine there. After I had spent much of my vacation DDR-ing, my two of my uncles tried to play. Let me just say that it was the funniest thing ever!

Scarred For Life

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My parents separated when I was 6 and sometimes I would go out with my dad. Once we were walking down a shopping area, I stopped to look at some cute shirt on a window display. Next thing I know my old man is crossing the street without me! My father was a distracted and unreliable person. I always had to go running after him an keep up with him so he wouldn't lose me!

Police

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My parents got pregnant young. When I was a baby (about one month), my mom accidentally locked me in the car with the heater on. She forgot that the back window was broken out and covered with a trash bag. She freaked out and called the fire department. When they showed up, they laughed in her face because all she had to do was untape the window!

Real Dumb

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One day, my stepdad (Farticus) and I were coming back from hunting. My cruelly brilliant teenage brain plotted. My mom was alone at home. I silently opened the back door and let loose a buck call. My mom thought 2 things(in order):
1. The dog exploded.
2. Bigfoot was attacking the house.
2 hours later, she finally came out of the bathroom.

Family Outing

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My family was leaving my grandma's house and my dog was in heat and wearing one of those weirdo cloth doggy diapers. We had a car seat in the car and she bolted in our car right into the car seat WEARING THE DIAPER!!!

Lost

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My parents sent my two teenaged brothers to pick up a dead relative from the hospital and transport her body to her relatives via horse and cart. This had to be done in the evening and, back in those days, we had no electricity. My brothers both fell asleep and realized as they approached her relative's home, the body was missing. We never stop laughing when he tells it.

Scarred For Life

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On Thursday, my older sister had to drive me to choir rehearsal. When we went into the garage, we found that the only car to drive was the stick shift. After that ride, I was happy to be alive. Every 5 feet, the car would shake! Never again will I get in that car with her as the driver!

Scarred For Life

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Growing up I thought it was normal for the adults to announce, "We're opening the wine! Go get all the kids," then proceed to serve small glasses of wine to each child over the age of eight. As I got older, I realized that this was not normal and that my mom and aunt would get my grandma to drink then make a drinking game based on any time she cussed or talked about sex.

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