Raising Hope

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MON 8/7c MAY 20

Raising Hope

My Family is Crazy

Everyone has a little crazy in their family.
Share a quick and funny story from your
childhood (or parenthood) that makes
you wonder just how you all survived.

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Crazy Stories:

Crazy Parent

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Mom came to me with this awsome trick she learned from friends in AA. The year 2011 minus how old you are will get the year you were born. It works on everybody. She got it after I sat down with her and worked through the math (several times). She came back the next day and told me she thought her friends were screwing with her because none of them got it either. MAGIC!

Lucky to be Alive

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When I was a baby, my mom used to tie me to a stone with some line to walk on. I was kinda wild and restless and could not sit still for long, so my mom found out that that was the solution for me not to run away. When my grandma had me while my parents was on holiday, she did the same thing when she was in the potato field. They did give me some toys to play with, though.

Police

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We live in a rural environment, so the drive to/from school would be pretty boring to my kids, make it easy for them to agitate one another, and make it hard for me to drive. I found that if I made up facts that they found puzzling, it would keep them quiet while they tried to figure out whether they were true or not. One example: Cops only eat donuts and drink coffee.

Scarred For Life

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When I was 13, I was selected to go to Chicago for a modeling convention. My mother was not "with it" so she asked my aunt if she would tag along. When we got to Chicago, my mother and aunt began speaking in a British accent to everyone (including each other) because it "sounded more posh." Needless to say, I only got one callback ... and then they talked to my mom.

Lucky to be Alive

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My dad and aunt were in the room after my mom gave birth to me. My mom couldn't move (may I remind you I had just born!) and I started peeing in my face. My mom begged my dad and aunt to help me but, instead, they let me pee in my own face while they laughed!

Family Outing

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My mom always threatened to sing if we didn't buckle our seat belts so we always buckled! One time, when a friend came along, we went to a drive-in for hamburgers. We kept touching my autistic brother to bug him and he got so mad that mom said, "Quiet down or I'll sing!" We didn't quit. Right when the guy asked for our order, mom sang our order in a loud opera voice. AHHH!

Crazy Parent

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My mother married my dad's brother. So, my mother is my aunt and my uncle is my dad, which means my sister is my cousin, my brother is my cousin, and my cousins are now my brother and fives sisters. That's not the end of it. By my reckoning, my daughters and sons are my nephews and nieces, as well. Oh, and I am my own cousin. Fortunately, Grandma and Grandpa remain same.

Crazy Parent

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I have a fear of toothpicks and my dad likes to tease me about it. One day, we were at a restaurant and my dad repeatedly pretended to stab his eyes out with toothpicks. The waitress was standing right behind us. She looked at him and walked away.

Crazy Parent

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One time, my family was at Walmart and I was in a dressing room. There was a bell outside of the dressing room and my mother began to ring it just to embarrass me. When that didn't work, she yelled "Do you need more toilet paper in there?" really loudly in front of the other customers. I didn't want to leave the dressing room!

Crazy Parent

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When I brought my baby home, I was sitting on the couch and noticed that my son smelled. I went to change him and threw up (not on him but next to him)!

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