House-isms
Season 8
He's brash, he's blunt, he's acerbic, he's...House. And, believe it or not, he does think before he speaks. Whether he's belittling his staff or explaining to patients precisely why they're so stupid, House is never at a loss for words, and we've selected the most outrageous quotes from each episode.
Nobody's Fault
"Put out an APB for a car with a man-shaped dent in the grill?"
"My process is proven. Good things usually happen. Bad things sometimes happen."
Dr. Cofield: "What are you doing?"
House: "Taking my Vicamins."
Dr. Cofield: "Are those Vicodin? Did you have surgery recently?"
House: "About a decade ago. My leg is no good at judging time."
"Those who can, do. Those who can't, teach. Those who can't teach, team gym. Those who can't move their arms or legs, teach us to laugh at others."
"If you want an accurate patient history, don't ever talk to the patient. Everybody lies . . . Except me. To you. Would never do that."
House: "If you're motivated by caring, bear in mind he's a dedicated chemistry teacher, with a pretty wife, and adoring students, baby on the way."
Adams: "She's not pregnant."
House: "Would it make a difference? Because I could knock her up."
Latest Full Episodes
8DAYS
Episodes appear online 8 days after airdate. Learn more
| Season/ Episode |
Episode Title | Description | Air Date | Expires |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| 8/9 | Runaways (44:03) |
 A marriage is tested in sickness and in health. |
01/30/2012 | 08/14/2012 |
| 8/9 | Better Half (43:57) |
 A marriage is tested in sickness and in health. |
01/23/2012 | 08/07/2012 |
| 8/8 | Perils of Paranoia (43:57) |
 A patient's paranoia has an adverse medical effect. |
11/28/2011 | 02/27/2012 |
| 8/7 | Dead And Buried (44:01) |
 A 14-year-old patient is suffering from more than teen angst. |
11/21/2011 | 02/20/2012 |
| 8/6 | Parents (44:03) |
 Parenting decisions leave a lasting impact. |
11/14/2011 | 02/13/2012 |
8 days
Episodes are available 8 days after airdate to subscribers of participating TV providers. Learn More
8 days
Episodes unlock 8 days after airdate.
Featured Extras
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'House M.D. - Blue Meanie' for Nintendo DSiWare
Solve dozens of original puzzles and mini-games to uncover critical clues in this medical mystery game featuring the stars from House. »
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House PC Game
Play along with Dr. House and his team as they race to unravel medical mysteries. »
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Sneak Peek on the App
Check out the InHouse app after all-new episodes of House for exclusive first looks and behind the scenes content. »
