Note: Many moons ago writer Natalie Chaidez chimed in with her breakdown of the Badass Writer Chicks of Sarah Connor. Well, here’s her long-ago promised take on the men of the writer staff now ready for your reading pleasure…
Well guess who got their tighty-whities in a bunch because I didn’t blog about them? The boy writers of SCC, who, in the interest of equal time for all candidates, will now get a few choice Chaidez comments about them.
Friedman. Genius screenwriter dabbling in one-hour drama and making all us seasoned TV pros look like amateurs in the process. Right now he’s rocking this circa 1976 Coppola shag, which he keeps threatening to cut but secretly I think he’s quite fond of. Josh is an awesome boss, and honestly the worst thing I can think of to say about him is that he, like every showrunner I’ve ever worked for, has developed some odd dietary quirks since his series began. For instance, he no longer eats Pop Tarts for breakfast, which in hindsight I suppose wasn’t the healthiest start to an exec producer’s day.
John Wirth, or “J Dub” as he is affectionately known here at SCC, is our other commander-in-chief. Wirth is the O.G. of the staff, and was brought on by the studio and network to teach Freidman the ropes of running a TV show, with his 800 years of production experience. In addition to his mad writing, on-set and editing skillz, he’s a raconteur extraordinaire. The man is a born story-teller. The staff’s favorite tale involves Don Johnson, two strippers in nurse get-ups and a ‘titty-whacking”. Need I say more?
Supervising Producer John Enbom is a worthless traitor who abandoned us for the petty task of running his own TV show. It’s a huge loss as he was both the classiest and funniest writer among us. His last episode (Alpine Fields) married a Cheever-esque critique of repression in WASP culture with an awesome killer robot plot. Which, in a nutshell, just about sums up Mr. Enbom himself.
Writing team/producers Ashley Miller and Zack Stentz are the fan-boy whiz kids every great sci-fi show needs. Ashley used to be a computer programmer, working for the military, which basically means he was building SkyNet. Zack can recite by memory the plot of every Star Trek episode, if you give him the title, and has a degree from Stanford in Soviet Cinema. They play Dungeons and Dragons every month, and Ashley actually demanded Comic-Con as a religious holiday. Again– need I say more?
Our SCC “new media” writer is Mr. Hadley Klein. If you took about a dozen cans of Red Bull, stirred in a couple double espressos and topped it off with a hit of crack, you just might have half the energy this kid has. Hadley is a lanky bundle of charisma, charm and hustle, poured into the world’s tightest pair of skinny jeans. It behooves me to only say kind things about him, as it’s quite clear that he will soon be all of our bosses.
Last but not least are our two staff writers, Ian Goldberg and Dan Thomsen. Ian wrote the brilliant season one finale, What He Beheld. Ian, like Friedman, is a Johnny Cash afficiando. He looks like a young, cuter version of the Clash’s Joe Strummer. Dan, on the other hand, looks like that shaggily hot blonde actor Sienna Miller was dating for a minute. He gets this thousand yard stare sometimes in the writers’ room, as if mulling over some deep, dark personal tragedy, which usually turns out to be just a lame plot point we pitched. He wrote the season one episode, Vick’s Chip, which was my fav because it implied Mr. and Mrs. Vick were having… yes… Terminator sex. The annoying thing about both these guys is that they’re so damn young and so talented.
Which, minus the damn young part, basically is how I feel about all the SCC guys.